Bente-tres and Seksi

Uy maygali 23 na pala ako. 23 na at ‘di pa rin alam kung anong gusto sa buhay. 23 na at di pa rin alam kung san pupunta. Kaloka naman. Dapat we become wiser as we age diba? Eh I aged a year na pero feeling ko 16 pa rin ako, sumisweet 16 din.

‘Wag kang ma-shock kung ‘di ‘to nasa English. Lumaklak kasi ako ng tatlong cups of black coffee kasi masyado nang “mainstream” ang tubig. Dapat flavored drink na para kunyare classy. Pero joke lang. Masarap kasing magkape kapag nagka-cramming. Lahat lumelevel up. Ambilis kong magbasa at take note, may comprehension pa. Whereas kung normal lang, kahit phoneme hindi ko macomprehend. Yung normal na 55 words per minute kong pagta-type sa computer eh umaabot ng 50wpm. Oha. Yung pawis ko rin, bongga. Parang bawat pore ng skin ko eh full blast kung mgsecrete. Waw secrete.

Anyway, napapaisip talaga ako nang bongga kung ano bang dapat kong abangan this year. May bago kayang Sarah-John Lloyd movie? (Yes, this question falls under the

Vavavoom!

Vavavoom!

“bonggang pinag-isipan” category.) Siyempre naman kasi sa latest movie nila may luha na si Sarah. Yung forreal and fo’sho kaya naman proud ako sa kanya. Nagpapasalamat din ako kina Rayver at Gerald kasi sinaktan nila puso ni Sarah, eh di may pinaghuhugutan na yan si Sarah. Idol ko yan siya. Kasi naman kahit nasaktan siya eh, “Pinili niyang magpatawad. Pinili niyang magmahal.” Hash-freakin’-tag that, Chrisine Reyes! On the other hand, si John Lloyd, aysus walang kakupas kupas yan. Umaariba pa rin ang whoremones ko (teka English word yun bat may red curvy lines ang whoremones?) Sorry baduy.

Magiging master na ba talaga ako pagkatapos ng postgraduate course ko? Sana may samurai (yung “ka-shing ka-shing” kasi diba samurai in the olden times eh military yan. basta.). Sana may samurai na freebie na kasama sa diploma. Siyempre kung master dapat indestructible. Wala man akong iron throne kaya basta may sword okay na. Mukhang may dignidad na rin yun.

Magiging nanay na kaya ako this year? Jusko. Kenat be. ‘Di pa fully paid yung braces ko, tapos 12 months pa para malutas ako sa postpaid ko, tapos yung monthly bill sa internet naming sinbilis ng lakad ko eh babayaran pa yan, atbp. Tapos siyempre yung boyfriend ko eh nasa ibang isla. ‘Di naman pwede ang virtual means. You don’t do that to me. Echos lang baka mabasa ng kuya ko ‘to. Baka sapakin si bunso. Mahirap na. Marami pa akong pangarap sa buhay. Echos again.

Magiging chubby pa rin ba ako? Hahaha. Rhetorical question daw ‘to sabi ng ego ko.

Magiging bitter pa rin ba ako? Kasi naman ‘tong si Nanay ipinamana pa saken yung pagiging echoserang teacher. Eh haynaku, gusto ko kasing mag-artista dati. Pero sabi niya maging praktikal daw ako. ‘Di ko gets yan. Lahat ng kilala kong artista mga practical, walang ilusyunado’t ilusyunada. Srsly.

I really don’t know what to expect this year. Narealize ko wala akong ibang goals kundi mabayaran bills ko. Ano ba ‘to? Lagi nalang bang nasa crossroad ako? Yang drama na yan pang high school lang yan. Maygad. ‘Di sana nakipagclassmate nalang ako sa mga students ko. I tell them to take life seriously. I tell them that every time we discuss literary texts na nabasa namin. Pero maygudnes naman, sa kaka-take ko sa life seriously ‘di ko pa rin maapply ang “The Road Not Taken” ni Robert Frost. Nagwa-wander lonely as a cloud pa rin ako. Proud siguro saken si Wordsworth. Naks. Matakot ka, literature yan. Alam kong tres ang grado mo niyan dahil hanggang ngayon ‘di mo madistinguish ang paradox sa irony.

Walking dead, yan paradox yan. Yung nanood ka ng movies or tv series na about za Funny-Zombie-Run-For-Your-Life-11zombies for dizazter preparednezz tapoz nakagat ka nang hindi man lang nabibigyan ng chance na makapatay ng isang walker. Yan irony yan. Oha. Matakot ka, echos lang yan.

So ano na nga? Wala. Yaan na. Sabi nga sa Ecclesiastes sa Holy Bible eh there’s a season for everything. Naman.  Tiwala lang. 

Meanwhile, magbabasa muna ako ng notes ko kasi report ko bukas. Baka taasan lang ako ng kilay ni ma’am. Mahirap na.

Sana naman happy ‘tong araw na ‘to. Sana may mag-appear na macbook in thin air para swak ang pagFacebook ko habang nagta-thank you sa mga nag greet sa akin kasi alam talaga nilang birthday ko, at half-hearted thank you sa mga nakihitch lang sa nakita sa news feed. Okay lang yan. ‘Di ko dadamdamin. Immature lang ang nagdaramdam, yung mga 22 and below.

Image

May the force be with you!

Paalam sa lahat.

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About foursees

This amateur writer/blogger is a journalist, one who writes and believes in the power of entries to diaries/journal and one who wrote once for a university’s student pub (-lication) in her glory days. She claims to be a connoisseur in being a couch potato. Her laptop and handheld phone are her closest and immediate friends. Despite her very crowded social/technical circle, she is fortunately not single. Not that she’s fooled herself that whoever comes this way and read her words would woe her, but that she’s ecstatic to declare that the world’s genuinely generous to pair her up with another couch potato. Maybe they’ll create more couch potatoes to rule and dominate this world one day. We never will know. Before, her Facebook page was her oyster. Before that, the world used to be. At the moment, she’s realized that one doesn’t stay too long in one thing and one place. As she hops from oyster to another, she believes that writing is her solidified sand, her pearl. She may not be a pro at it but it held her in one piece. And so she says to one and all, cheers to blogging! Cheers to patching wounds! Cheers to several meaninglessness and nothingness of life! Cheers to awfully crappy days! Cheers to love, to distant love! Cheers to ranting! Cheers to happiness! -foursees
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2 Responses to Bente-tres and Seksi

  1. Satan Jr. says:

    yeeee. tagalog. =D

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